Dear Blessed One,
Who is the self that is looking for the self?
Find the one who is looking and then you will see the silliness of it all. It’s a cat chasing its own tail.
You are already here. When awakening happens, it’s not because the self has been found, it is because the seeker has dissolved in the light of conscious awareness.
Eventually the mind-made self sees what it’s doing, sees that the emperor has no clothes, the game of chase ends, and the seeker dissolves.
The unlearnable truth of you is not the cultivated self. The conditioned, programmed, running-on-autopilot self is not your effortless, natural, present self. This is the man-made or mind-made self, the illusory self.
Watch as the mind delivers more ideas of what to do to find the self. How many ways are there to find the self? Countless, I’m sure. The mind is very good at keeping one quite busy seeking through many avenues, anything other than quietly being right “here”.
Stop looking. Be still, right where you are. Take one long conscious breath and see if you can allow life to move you in the next moment without thinking, “I should…”, “I need…”, “I want…”, “I have to…”, “I can’t…”, “It’s time…”, “I’ve tried…”. Take a look at that “I” and see if you can separate from it…for one conscious breath.
If there is no discernible movement during or after the breath, be with that, and take another deep conscious breath. Again continue to wait for the impulse of life to show you the next move for this form called “I”.
Detach from the litany of to-dos and allow yourself, if even for just a few moments, to not know anything. See if you can detect the Creative Impulse that moves through you, gently guiding you, rather than listening to the demands of the illusory self.
You cannot be here and be looking for the self because the self is already here. The challenge is to trust that, exhale, stop believing the mind, and allow life to show you in each moment the effortless magic of Presence.
Seeing and dropping illusion (sometimes over and over), will create an opening just big enough for the light of awareness to be recognized. Once that happens, ho boy, what a good belly laugh you will have.
Much Love and Blessings to You,
“We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality.” ~Iris Murdoch